few thoughts 09292008

1. The coolness of Italians finally came to its truest form last night as I discovered this grocery store that sells all of following: milk, bread, roasted chickens, salads, chocolates, allergy medicines, cough drops, FLAT SCREEN TVs, PSPs, apple pies, and BICYCLES. Although they sell some nasty cake. Shame on you, Italy and your cream fillings (the 'cream filling' in the cake actually stung my mouth like...um...toothpaste)
2. inside joke of the day: wrap a bacon around it
3. I really like walking...wondering isn't too bad, either. Life is like a big maze, anyway.
4. Europeans have really bad sense of musical taste but good thing is at least they are honest about it...Europeans rarely have their 'a guilty pleasure provided by ipod' moment.
5. Tell me about all the culture shock but I realize this every time when I'm out in the foreign country (including Canada) but White people (Americans) are the most craziest people in the world.
6. It is so awesome to just think about me and nothing else. Not that I don't care about anybody or anything around me but I find myself care about myself first than anything else around me. How I want to position my internal self...I ask myself this everyday, 'What do you want for your life and what are you going to do about it?'. Loneliness used to be a sign of desolation and it still maybe is but in this wide open space, loneliness is a freedom. It may leave me wondering and even empty at times but it does not agonize me anymore, at least not for now for sure. It is amazing what the new place do to you. I don't even trying to fit into this world but I let myself just float around this atmosphere. While I am doing that, I see those things I left behind dissolving itself to a distant past. It used to hurt me and it used to beat me up so bad but it's not as bad as before now; I don't lose my sleep over it. Sure, I think about it but it doesn't mean I'd want to stab my heart and soul for it. NO, NOT ANYMORE. Confidence is the next thing I need to work on, however.
7. Old Polish couple doing calisthenics on 6 o'clock in the morning, a dude's cell phone with a low battery beeping, a bunk bed that will take your life away, dudes are harmonizing their snorrings, and yes, a French couple having sex -twice- and I thought the all the way it was a jet lag.
8. 'fitting in' and 'settling' are two of most overrated things in the world. Problem is WE ALL WANT IT. I want it, too.
9. Oh my god, flashback...stop it. Seriously.